Life’s a Series of Moments

This article is a reprint from a column I pen each month for the website of my high school class www.DanMccarty70.com.  While it has been over four decades since the 400+ of us exploded from the halls of Dan McCarthy High and into our lives, today over 250 of us still meet on a regular basis in cyberspace to remember, smile and stay in touch.  I hope you enjoy my Ramblings.

Life’s a Series of Moments

As the years flow by like the receding tide from the Indian River Lagoon through the jetty-lined Ft. Pierce inlet, I am struck by how our lives really boil down to a series of moments—some good, some not so, some special, and some forgotten shortly after they occur. This series of separate and oh-so-different moments weave to form the tapestry of our lives.
Thinking back on my life and the many things I’ve done right, and not so, I am reminded of the catchy little tune for the recent TV commercial for the new HP laser printer: “It ain’t what you do… it’s the way that you do it.” Some of us, me included, have really done it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BduCTDh0SRY

At last week’s All-Class Party sponsored by the Classes of ‘69, ’70, and ’71, I chatted with a high-school girlfriend, and we talked about all that had happened in our lives over the past four decades. I am unsure, but as she left, I could have sworn that I heard her praying a little prayer: “Lord, thank you for not sticking me with him. It is not what he does; it is the way that he does it.”
I’m also almost certain that I’ve heard my sweet wife of thirty plus years uttering the same sort of comment: “I feel like killing him… not for what he does, but the way he does it.” Anyway, I think it is time for me to get off this thought tributary and back to the main river again.
In my younger years, these moments of my life all too often slipped by without notice. Today, I work hard on preventing that at all cost. The young Richard was too busy earning a living and trying to be cool to pay much attention to many of these seemingly unimportant moments. The older more refined RP looks for reasons to stop and be thankful to absorb it all like a dry sponge.
That younger version would never think of shedding a tear in public or professing his love for anyone of the male persuasion. The graying, plumper variety can tear up at the site of a puppy or a baby and can cry like that proverbial baby at something as commonplace as The Star-Spangled Banner, a flag-draped coffin, or a text from a busy grandbaby. I never hang the phone up after talking to Lester, Bobby, Ricky, or Doc without telling them I love them. Hey, guys, can you imagine us saying that in the shower after gym class? Yes, time changes much.
I had a few of those life moments at last week’s All-Class Party. One of those new moments was before the party as I spent a couple of very pleasant hours with Sheila and Greg Simmons.(Grego for many of you who grew up loving that gravel voice, crooked smile, and bright eyes. By the way, for the record, the gravel voice belongs to Grego, not Sheila.)

Before the party, I had another moment with Ricky and Beannie Silverstein who showed up an hour early just in case their old buddy needed a helping hand. I did. Beannie as always helped, and Ricky as always told her and me how we could do it better. Remember, Ricky, it ain’t what you do, but the way that you do it.

During the party, I had several special moments. Hearing Gina Turner’s laugh, I never get tired of that laugh.  I think we should send her to the United Nations – I am sure worldwide peace would breakout as a result.  Then there was Buckwheat trying to again explain which of the Walters twins are which - I give up on that one.  There was seeing Robin Blanton, Ford Sloan & Colleen McDonald for the first time in 43 years, spending time with Mike Broom and his brother Larry (don’t scare us like that Larry), Fast  Eddie’s rapid-fire stories (that will never change), Vic, Rick and Jimmie Anne’s kindness and hard work, Robin's smile, Joel Swain’s slow deep Southern draw (watch out ladies), celebrating Kathy Simmons birthday (great timing – or at least on your parents part), meeting Diane’s beau Jeff (if he still loves you after meeting us, he is a keeper), Kenny and Audrey trying to pay me to take their photo (BTW it takes more than $20 bucks), Christal and Mike classing up the joint, Cindie’s hug (thanks Heav), and seeing David Smith forgot to age.  And then there was the realization that the big kids in the Class of 69 were not so big anymore and the little kids in 71, turned out OK after all, even if they did take their high school away.

The one and only Gina Turner

Kenny and Audrey with the payoff to Richard

Christal and Mike

Vic the Class of 71's fearless leader

Cindie and Heav

The 1969 Gang

The Boys are Back in Town

Dale, Ricky, Richard, Doc and Ford

But there was two very special moments that standout that night.  The first was seeing Debra Pitts and Doc McKinney.  We all know they both have had some not-so-pleasant moments this year, each having battled cancer. I have been uplifted by both and so impressed by the courage shown by each and by their positive mental attitudes. This photo of the two of them together, hugging and smiling—well, that, my friends, was a very special moment I shall cherish for a long time.

Doc & Debra - Lookin' Good Guys

The other was seeing Kathy Thomas who has also had a difficult time over the last few months.  Know you are in our prayers Kathy and it was great seeing you.
After the party, Bobby Harrell offered his coach as my home-away-from-home for the night. Because his Gator-crazed beauty of a wife Tammy was at the Florida/Georgia game trying to shake a pissed-off Bulldog from her ankle, I took him up on his gracious offer. We spent a few hours outside his coach engulfed in a cool clear Florida night, not a cloud in the sky, reminiscing of the separately experienced and jointly shared moments of our lives, as we together created a few new ones. Bobby, you thought I could not find a cigar in Ft. Pierce after 10:00 p.m. “Hey, man, how did you get in here… we are close”.

Yes, all these special and unique moments comprise the sum of that which has become our journey—the journey of life. Each one of these thoughts and events, times and places, people and memories are all connected—in our heads and in our hearts. Be these moments big or small, whether they make a big splash in the pool of our life or a single almost unnoticeable ripple, they are all still connected, all still related, all part of the landscape that lines this long and winding road we have traveled for now six decades.

So, as we near our retirement years and this next chapter of our lives, it is helpful to remember that everything we do today, next Wednesday, next year, and all the years still to come are moments we will look back on one day. The question is whether we look back with joy or regret. Will our journey be enhanced or worsened by those moments? The choice is ours to make, and the moments are ours to spend as we choose.
I think this older version of Richard will choose to make as many of these moments as memorable as possible. So, if you have the misfortune to find yourself in the same space and time as yours truly, watch out because you might wind up smack dab in the middle of one of my moments… or maybe me in yours.
Keepin’ the Spirit Alive One Moment at a Time

Richard Parker